white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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