absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
