3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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