I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
