Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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