My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
