Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
