One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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