Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Dignity is for republicans.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
