when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
tell your sister to shave her snatch
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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