Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
