somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I just googled if crying burns calories
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Crop dusting thru forever 21
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
