At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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