Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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