I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
