But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
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