Non-Jews are for practice
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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