turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
no more duck duck goose at the bar
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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