Grow some girl-balls and come out already
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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