IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
