is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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