I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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