Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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