im holly from the hills drunk
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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