I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
