Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
you would pick up someone in the library
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
