Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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