everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
being pregnant is like rehab
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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