i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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