Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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