last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm really busy with my period
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