But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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