To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
my mouth tastes like poor choices
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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