I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
there is glitter all over my balls
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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