thus making me awesome and them whores
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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