I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
