Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Houston, we have a blender
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
