Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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