The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
