i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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