Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
