Heybabeimwearingurpanties
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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