I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
