don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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