apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
