love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
