This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
