I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
thus making me awesome and them whores
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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