Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
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