How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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